Back home. I took Nal at 1:30 this afternoon in anticipation of friends coming over to drink at about 3:00. It is 10:45 in the evening now and I have been continuously drinking ever since. I am entirely lucid at this point, where normally I would have probably been blacked out by now after 9 hours of straight drinking. I am coherent and thinking properly. I am aware I have been drinking, but my mind works.
My total consumption has been six beers and one margarita over that time. That's it. I can't believe it! I wasn't even keeping score until just now when I had to count the empties. I wasn't even pacing myself. How is that possible?
I just took another Nal because I have now been returned to my most dangerous environment for the first time in this treatment. My friends are gone and I am now alone and in the dark on my boat sitting in the exact spot where so many nights have gone by unremembered. This is my greatest test. I am now left unaccompanied and unaccountable for my actions.
I just opened another beer, but my interest in it is minimal. I'm sipping it. The 375ml of vodka I bought earlier? I don't even want it and it's sitting right here next to me. I am completely uninterested in the very thing that I relied so heavily on just one month ago.
This is one hell of a "honeymoon period," which is what I was told to expect early on in this method. I simply feel completely in control right now. This is so mind-blowing, I have no words for it. Today I was able to find a good level "buzz" and I maintained it without blowing right through it to a black out state. For the first time ever I got a glimpse of what "normal" people must be like.
I am simply amazed.
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